The first week of our two month Mexican habitation has gone like the clappers, being filled with a glorious amount of nothing, and a bit of surfing, eating and sleeping in between. I could happily describe to you in detail quite how nice it’s been to finally relax in some proper sunshine, with properly priced beer and sea water at the proper temperature, but that could probably be quite tedious by the end of the first day, so instead I’ve reached deep into my rusty toolbox of writing, and thought of a decent idea that might just be more exciting than a step by step recount of every minute spent under the sun and every inch of the subsequent burns I have received. The result of my intended genius is the idea of gifting you readers with a little introduction to Mexico, or at least the Mexico that we’ve been lucky enough to fall in, and hopefully give you an insight into the extraordinary and undocumented life of a Mexican, by which of course I mean three british tourists hiding out from the real world in this little slice of heaven.
The first department of Mexican life that needs to be boasted about is our accomadation, which has been quite unbelievably amazing. For the first few days of the week, due to Alec’s (Eliots dad) hotel being too full, and actually due to our shocking organisational and communications skills, we were living in a holiday house known as the ‘huevos’ which strangely translates to the small oval shaped things that pop out of chickens. However, as we could just about make out the shape of the building in the dark of our first night, we quickly understood why the three oval shaped parts of the house were labelled as looking like eggs. Upon first crashing though the doors of the pre-glassed house we knew coul hear the crashing waves that were obviously not far from the patio of our cottage, but upon making up to the sound of said waves, and walking out towards the lit up infinity pool looking like nothing short of a pile of fatigued potatoes, I discovered just how perfect the location of the huevos was in relation to the incredible Pacific Ocean and the sun that was beaming down on it. This made barbecuing outside around the glass fire pit whilst watching the glorious sun go down extra special, and it may not have had a kitchen, and it may have been part of the nature around us, but the huevos was an incredible place to settle in to Mexican life. However, Alec’s hotel quickly blew the eggs far, far away, as his Mecian style paradise, created with the natural palapa roof tops, and the coconut trees, cacti and palm trees, is nothing short of heaven. Of course, no paradise would be complete with hammocks, a swinging chair, and numerous resident animals, including a horse eating dog and a family of iguanas. It’s only been a week, and I’ve already spent so much time beside the pool and under the sun that i’ve transformed myself into a glistening sun cream covered lobster, and I’m not about to stop. I kid you not, this place is literally perfect.
A huge part of the Mexican life, that we sort of already knew before coming here but are now completely satisfied that the rumours are true after only the first day, is food. As you can imagine, for Los Tres Amigos, this suited us down to the ground, and thankfully the majority of the Mexican diet consists of amazing food that is abosultely dirt cheap. Ever since Alec shared his vast knowledge and insight into the good and the bad of the Todos Santos cuisine during a little tour of the little town, we’ve been quickly working our way around the hotspots, mainly judging each restaurant on the quality and price of their tacos, and whether or not they have wifi. In fact, we are now so obsessed with the unbelievable Mexican food, we now judge everything we buy on how many tacos we could get for that same price. It’s a tough comparison to beat, especially when us three teenagers really cant be fucked to kick dinner and no that just a short drive away is the fantastic restaurant called Los Pablanos where we can bring our own dirt cheap beers, watch some baseball (it’s always baseball) and enjoy some cheap tacos after being entertained by the chefs unique full body chopping style. But this begs the question, what if one would just like a good old game of ‘food poisoning or no food poisoning’? Well, that would be easy, one would simply have to wander down the road, pick up some tamales, which are essentially an incredible creation of dough or masa, steamed in corn leaves, for less than the cost of anything at the pound shop, and then return home after eating one or two or three and sit by the toilet in eagerness to find out whether you’ve hit the jackpot. Luckily for our stomachs, we’ve survived the delicious ordeal, but even if we had ended up exploding at both ends, I know I personally would have marched straight back down to the lady and her little tamale stand, and ordered her to give me a few more. Seriously, the food is actually perfect.
Although the highlight of the first week, for me anyway, has been the regular activity of doing absolutely nothing for hours on end, as three young beings, we have been naturally required to find some sort of entertainment to fill the time in between each session of skin-sizzling sun-bathing. The most common activity of choice has been the compulsory sport of surfing, which even for me as complete amateur and notoriously bad boardsman, has been really good fun. I find myself quite confused as to how I can sit here telling you that I have enjoyed my time getting demolished by huge waves that love to just partially drown me and and fill my body with salt water, but there’s something very strangely addictive about the pain a surfer feels in order to catch the ultimate wave. Fun isnt just limited to drowning here though, and we’ve began stockpiling a long list of shit to do, including kayaking, snorkelling and cliff jumping, and we’ve also heard about a game unique to Todos Santos, which Alec has told us involves frisbying cheap ham from the side of the road and aiming for a dog that lives on top of one of the locals houses. This is a common practice for dogs in the area apparently, however this lucky son of a bitch lives the ultimate life thanks to Alec and his increasingly entertaining friends. I think we’re going to stick to chilling out for now though. Honestly, I already know this place is going to be fucking fun.
The last part of our Mexican dream has been pretty crucial in order to allow us to make the most of the last three elements of life here, and that would be transport. It seems no matter where you go in the world, a vehicle is almost always abosultely crucial, but also manages to add that extra little something to a trip that you just can’t replace. This time around, we have been bestowed a shitty little two wheel drive Nissan, with a tape deck, roll up windows, and a unique locking system. Some would see this as a pointless truck that should be four wheel drive, that is undrivable without an AUX cable, annoying because one has to use actual effort to put the windows down in the common event of overheating, and completely barbaric due to its insistence that every door has to be opened separately. However, after racking up the miles during this first week, mainly between Alec’s house and the deathly surf beach, as well as on many missions to get food, we’ve typically become extremely attached to the little runner. This is mainly down to the incredible and only tape in the vehicle, courtesy of Jimmy Buffet and his class country songs including ‘cheeseburger in paradise’ and my personal favourite ‘get drunk and screw’ that we have now listened too well over 100 times. We have also fell in love with the lax Mexican traffic laws, which allow one (usually me) or several (most of the areas population) to relax in the back of the truck whilst the wind smacks into ones face and ruins ones hair, as well as providing one with a hell of an authentically fun road trip. As with pretty much every vehicle we’ve been lucky enough to drive, break and live in, the Nissan has defied expectations and played such a huge part in our adventures, making the roads of Mexico so much more fun, and a little bit more dangerous. Believe me, transport is amazing out here.
And that’s pretty much our first week of Mexican life put into some words, and I think that’s done it justice, as long as you now understand that this little slice of Mexico is high on the list of incredible places we’ve been lucky enough to stray upon, but is fantastically different to anywhere I’ve ever been. Baja California, shoutout to you, you little beauty.